Skip to main content

No sorry, no thank you...Nope, we're too modern for all that.

The other day, at my local library, I saw a little girl approaching the heavy glass front door. Now, this door is one of those -push-or-pull-with-all-your-might-contraptions, you know the kind where you push when you're supposed to pull, and vice versa. I knew that little girl wouldn't be able to budge it, so I moved forward and held it open for her. And right behind her, breezed in her mom, dressed in casual pants and shirt and probably in her early 30s. And probably at least five years younger than me. So there I am standing there holding the door open, and there's the young mom, walking in happily, with not so much as by your leave. As if I wasn't there at all. I felt like a doorknob.

Whatever happened to little courtesies? If a stranger opened the door for me, let alone for my child, I would thank that person. But no, not this young mom. So now, that little girl will grow up thinking it's fine to not say "thank you" when someone does something for her. Sad.

That experience left a bad taste but it's not just me growing old. The world is an uncaring place. I have a travel agent friend who works extremely hard. Her job does have quite a bit of travel--for instance, one trip involved 10 days in South Africa and boy, that was hard!! The trips abroad are fun but not frequent. Her daily work involves ticketing, planning trips (from the best airfares, to hotel/taxi bookings) for her clients, processing visas, and often, checking if clients' passports are valid. "Sometimes I have clients mailing me at 1 am or 2 am demanding immediate action. Others think that I am supposed to do their work on Sundays too, or even if I am actually ill and at home. Yes, getting the details done is my job, but not once do my clients say 'thank you' for all the work I do. That is what gets me down," she tells me.

In the movie Maine Pyar Kiya, a young Salman (with real hair intact, but shirtless, as usual), tells his young love, Bhagyashree (who had lovely hair, incidentally!), that "Friendship mein, no sorry, no thankyou". That line was a huge hit too. Just like the movie.

But for me saying 'thank you', and 'excuse me', and 'sorry', does matter. Okay, maybe I am growing old, but these little courtesies are important. For me, it means I care. About the people I interact with and the world I live in.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Wasteland

Something happened over the past two days. Our next door neighbours, or rather one particular family (like all metrizens in this cramped city, we live within literally, touching distance of the others in our neighbourhood), have decided to demolish their home. Fine, so what, you ask. They see how valuable land now is. Who can blame them? But along with their home, they have also decided to kill off the two trees -- a mango tree and a coconut tree -- in their compound. I used to look at those trees from my kitchen window. The mango tree, in particular, was a welcome sight. Bunches of ripe green fruit used to hang heavily from it. Looking at it, I'd think of my home in Kerala -- of the time when I was a little girl in a white petticoat helping my father pluck mangoes as they slowly changed from parrot green to a golden reddish-yellow-orange shade. That was our annual summer ritual, you see. My father plucked mangoes using a long stick with a hook or a 'kokka' (in my collo...

turtles in our own shells

Sometimes silence can be beautiful and humbling. On World Disabled Day, I went to Cubbon Park's Bal Bhavan for a government-organised function. It was the usual kind of event -- you know, where babus give dry speeches about existing schemes, unused funds and so on and where corporate types stress the need for 'partnerships' (involving big monies and big projects for their own corporate entities!). It was pretty dry, pretty predictable. Then something happened.Some of the deaf and mute adolescents standing on the fringes started carrying on an animated conversation among themselves. As I watched fascinated and a little shamefaced to be such an flagrant observer, the young men laughed, joked, kidded each other -- all in complete, absolute and perfect silence. Hands waving, fingers flaying, eyes rolling, they talked. Of what, I don't know. But I saw their joy. Their utter camaraderie, and harmony. And seeing them, I, in my 'normal' world of speaking tongues and ...

Life lessons from little people

Sometimes children say and do the darndest things. And help you learn something new about life and living.... When little man was just over a year old, he ate a cockroach egg. Or at least, he tried to. But my husband noticed and hurriedly got it out. Baby probably had a taste, though. Ugh. Why did he think he could eat something like that? I realised children don’t subscribe to our notions of ‘good’, ‘bad’ and utterly yuck--till we actually (like I did), have a mini meltdown and yell that they absolutely cannot just pick up shiny, brown objects, just because said objects look interesting! But then children are so open in their approach to life. So trusting, for one thing. For a long time, when he was a baby, he would happily exclaim "Ajja" or ‘Ajji’ (Kannada for ‘grandfather/grandmother') whenever he spotted a white-haired gentleman or lady. He would hold his arms out with a winsome smile. The recipients would coo and respond in kind. Till, my husba...